Give more meaning to his life: an illusion?

To be happier, to fulfill oneself, to live one's vocation ... So many dimensions of the contemporary existential quest, and as many possible lures. For to shape a destiny to its measure requires self-awareness ... and humility.

Flavia Mazelin Salvi

"Beyond the desire to stay alive, beyond the pursuit of pleasure, man is animated by an equally powerful force that drives him to fulfill himself, to give meaning to his existence and to more fully meet life, because living is not enough for him, he wants to have the feeling of living well, "writes the philosopher Reza Moghaddassi 1 , posing what is undoubtedly the l 'The most shared aspiration.' Many of us feel that we are far from the point, that we are not fully what we are called to be, that we are not giving everything we have to give, nor receive what we can receive, "he continues before naming what explains our frustration and our dissatisfaction: our thirst for essential. A thirst that, for him, comes to evoke the quest for contemporary meaning, "precisely because it is a refusal to give in to the absurdity of a mechanical life deserted by the spirit."

The freedom of modern Western man is as dizzying as it is agonizing, recalls the psychoanalyst Gerard Bonnet 2 . "For with freedom comes responsibility," he says. "Unlike our fathers Following the path that we have followed, we are now returned to ourselves, the benefits of this freedom being the autonomy it provides, and thus the feeling of escaping from predetermination, but the counterpart is not less. Living one's life now requires one to dig deeper within oneself to find one's desire, one's ideal, then to choose all that will feed and satisfy them.There are more and more people between 30 and 40 years old who question everything, want to let go of everything, their couple, their work, because they feel they are missing out on their existence. "

Exceed the illusion of" everything possible "

Reza Moghaddassi sees in this malaise a reflection of the time. "If today the individual has the impression to miss his life is because he thinks he should have been somewhere else, that he should have done or had something else, forgetting the essential, which is his quality of being where he is, he says. This feeling of failure is rooted in a totally empty theory of freedom that spoils our era, because it is understood almost exclusively as having the maximum of choice (I do what I want when I want, with whom I want , or I want…). Now, to live is, willy-nilly, to decide, to take a path [...], to give up the infinite possibilities to explore one.But since the individual would like to have several lives or remain in the omnipotence of choice, he ends up feeling stifled because his choices led him to give up other paths. He has the feeling of locking himself into a possible, nostalgic of the moment when all was, or continues to squint on the other possible. "To try to lead an existence that gives us meaning and pleasure, we must at the same time turn our backs on the fantasies of the virtualities, the expectation of the great revelation - accepting, like the poet Fernando Pessoa, the idea that we may have received no mission on earth 3 - and back to our personal history

1. In The Thirst for the Essential, who has not dreamed of a better life? of Reza Moghaddassi (Marabout).

2. Gérard Bonnet, author of Autopsychanalysis, forgetfulness, slip of the tongue, loss of objects and Narcissism, of self-love to the love of others (Editions In Press).

3. Fragment 6: "I have, perhaps, not received any mission on earth" in Fragments of a motionless trip of Fernando Pessoa (Shores, "Pocket").

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