Children and divorce

Children and divorce

Divorce is not only difficult for the couple but it is also difficult for children. How can we manage this crisis?

Martine Teillac

Psychoanalyst and psychotherapist

answers

1) How to deal with guilt over children?

The problem of guilt in a divorce often arises: we have invested in the creation of a family that we wanted to see succeed. It is wrong to feel that the child will necessarily suffer. But it turns out that it is much less harmful for a child to see his parents separate, than to live in a climate more or less openly conflict in which the little one feels that parents do not love each other. A separation explained, with a strong emphasis on the fact that the father will remain the father all his life, and the mother likewise, is much easier to bear especially if one takes care to explain that no one is guilty in this story.

2) What to answer to teenagers who judge the parent who wants to divorce?

Children do not have to dictate what their parents can or can not do. If not, they play the role of parents, which is not their role. And worse, they play the role of normative parents. Everyone knows what is good for him. Nobody else

On the other hand, when these teenagers become adults, they will have their own life, their own choices and they will also learn what a life of a couple can be. If we parents want to transmit to our children some liberties and some free will in this area, we must start by giving ourselves this freedom and this free-will.

Read also:

  • How do we know if we still love it?
  • Guilty of breaking
  • Divorce is difficult decision
  • Reviving after divorce

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