My daughter suffers from not being like me

My daughter suffers from not being like me

My 17 year old daughter is Métis. Apparently she has no integration problem and saw it very well apart from an observation that often comes up: "Mom, we are not alike, you have hair bound and curly (she would like to have the same and do not dream that of smooth hair), you have blue eyes, etc ... you are beautiful and me no ... ". So she is really pretty. In short, she suffers from her non-resemblance to me, unlike her friends "who all look like their mother". lilou2309 - 49 years old

Gérard Apfeldorfer

Psychiatrist and psychotherapist


Does your daughter suffer from not being like you, or does she suffer from being Métis? Because it is not easy to be, mixed race, to be neither white nor black, to be in this between-two. To whom, then, are our belongings?

Often, everything depends on the point of view one takes. First of all, from a genetic point of view, hybridization and mixtures have always proved their superiority over consanguinity, both in the plant kingdom and in the animal kingdom. Then, from a cultural point of view, the half-breeds have two affiliations, which constitutes a wealth, and leads to a greater breadth of view.

Or maybe I'm wrong? What your daughter suffers is to look like her father, of whom you do not say anything. Is he present? Are you in good relationship with him? Is that where this rejection comes from your daughter half of herself?


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