What to tell my children about my abortion?

What to tell my children about my abortion?

As my baby was not viable, I had to interrupt my pregnancy. I explained to my two children (8 years old and 3 years old) that he was sick. But I can not tell them he was not normal. Hadrian

Claude Halmos

Psychoanalyst

Answers

Explaining a medical termination of pregnancy to children is difficult. This involves re-explaining the baby's conception and slow development in the womb. By stating that, in some cases, the baby may have a disease or a malformation that would not allow him to live normally. I do not see what else can be explained about "abnormality".

Your impression of not having said everything therefore probably refers to all the questions and guilts that the idea of ​​an "abnormal" baby can arouse in a mother's head. That is, things that you may find difficult to formulate for yourself. But that do not concern your children.

And it seems normal to me that your 3-year-old son does not understand that the baby is no longer there when your belly is still "fat". Because he was told he was fat ... because there was a baby inside. His incomprehension proves his intelligence. It is therefore useless to add a worry to your grief already so heavy.

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