What to do so that my daughter finally obey me?

What to do so that my daughter finally obey me?

I am 39 years old, two girls (7 and 4 years old). The youngest never obeys me, everything is a drama. It is all the more terrible since, since the death of my brother, a year ago, I can not live anymore. How to get out? Sylvaine, Clermont-Ferrand

Claude Halmos

Psychoanalyst

responds

I believe, Sylvaine, that your suffering prevents you from taking a step back to understand what is happening. Your brother, when he died, lived at home because your husband had to be away for fourteen months. So at 2 years old, your daughter saw her father leave (did they explain the reasons for his absence?) And his uncle arrived. Did she know that he was your brother (and what did that mean)? Did she know that her father was willing to be there? Or could she, for lack of explanations, believe that he was coming to take his place?

Anyway, she became attached to him and he died. Second disappearance. Did he announce his death? Have we explained the reasons? This is important because it can be attributed responsibility or imagined that, as a magician, you had the power to make appear and disappear men.

Moreover, since that death, you say, you say, very badly. Did you explain to him your sorrow and especially explain that it is not the cause? One should understand what is going on in one's head. Knowing that she can also, by incessantly provoking you, unconsciously try to "occupy" you to prevent you from sinking into depression.

I think, Sylvaine, that you should consult a professional who can help you, help you, and allow your father to take his place.

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